Social Media: Arch Nemesis or Superhero Sidekick?

 

~ Training & Philosophy for Speakers, Entertainers & Business Owners ~ 

 

Maybe you’ve heard my story about becoming present with my son on our Daddy-Son Day, as I realized I was looking at Facebook rather than enjoying his 3-year old moment on the slide at the McDonald’s PlayPlace all those years ago.

He is now 10 years old and the moment, 7 years hence, when I deleted the Facebook app, in order to promise and focus more on the present moment, has been a very important story for many people through the years, but mostly for me.

I learned early in my Facebook days that I was addicted to it, and have done all possible to remedy that.  Any time I sign in on my computer to any social media site I have a personal policy with myself to only look and scroll if I’m commenting, liking, and posting.

That is a promise that is hard to keep, but essential to my not getting sucked into mindless scrolling.

A month ago I was challenged by the leader of my church to take a social media fast for one week.  I took things a step further and went pretty much a full month, with an occasional check in here and there due to having a birthday in the middle of it all.

As healthy as the fast was I have seen a few things happen in my business since then, that from a performer and entrepreneur’s perspective, you may want to take note:

1. I no longer feel that constricting comparison short of breath nervousness I would feel every time I’d log in and see all everyone else was doing and had to somehow try and keep up.
2. I no longer live with this pressure of seeming perfect and creating content that matters and fills a feed.
3. I realize how much I enjoy my interactions on social media and that it really is a social experience, mostly through commenting, connecting, and being in touch.
4. I realize how many events, birthdays, book launches, deaths, news, significant moments I have missed, as these things are rarely on an email blast or sent out in letter form anymore.
5. I no longer worry about the mess I might cause, or the stir of my opinions, by seeing the absurd reactions of others that don’t understand my intentions when posting.
6. I realize my clever posts don’t live up to their supposed hype.
7. I noticed a very sharp dive in business requests, momentum in bookings, and engagement following even the largest of events and professional moments.
8. I realize how much I have relied on validation of likes, shares, and emojis when they either happened or didn’t where I expected them.
9. I see the amount of ego social media demands, and yet equally the humanity it can expand.
10. I noticed the people around me consumed by it’s grasp and the ways in which I filled in that void without it, either by reading something significant, or interacting with my family.

So what is the verdict?

How do you feel about social media?

As I pondered through this with my wife we determined that I will always have to fight the addiction to scroll and mindlessly wander through the fields of feeds that are literally our virtual reality.

And yet the importance of the interaction, engagement, social aspect, and business is relationships truth isn’t going away.

Last November I posted this video about staying focused with social media and phones and how to keep ourselves from going too off course –

 

So, today, my wonderful patient beautiful wife sat next to me as I just put all the apps back on my phone, stuck them in a little box on the second page of my iPhone, and we committed that I would utilize it for the relationship aspect of making my business continue to work, while promising myself not to let it distract me from family.

You don’t need to read my therapy and reasoning and tell me what to do.  I’m just telling you what we are doing over here in our little world with the hopes that it will inspire you in whatever challenges you are facing.

Question I have for you is what are you doing to make sure your life is amazing outside of the need for validation from a thumbs up or a laughing emoji, a share or a comment from someone far far away, while being as present as possible with those in your very presence?

Is social media your Arch Nemesis or Superhero Sidekick?  Seems to me that sometimes the greatest among us have a pretty good amount of both in us anyways, so why wouldn’t it be the same with this?

And seriously, you wouldn’t believe how many people thought I was just dead until they saw me in person, because I wasn’t posting anymore.  And they didn’t even call!!!